The sudden end of girlhood, the beginning of when females are perceived as women instead of young girls, is a fast and unexpected transition with no time to settle in and process the concept.
One seventeen-year-old senior L.Z. said, “I remember it was one of the last days of school in sixth grade, when the boys were rating all the girls in class, and someone said that I was hot. At first it was funny, but then I really thought about it, and it was extremely weird because of course at the time I was only twelve years old. To be seen as hot instead of the usual pretty and cute, it felt objectifying.”
The uncomfortableness of being seen as a woman
Miami High graduate Yasmine Chavarria stated, “Men cat call me all the time. I could be wearing a pair of the biggest, baggiest jeans ever and a baggy shirt and there will still be men staring everywhere you go, no matter what you wear. No matter how much you cover up, there will always be a man staring at you or catcalling you or trying to get your attention.”
Senior Chloe Lopez added, “I always feel uncomfortable around people and the way they look at me because they always tell me I have to do this, and I haven’t done this, and that I have to cover up or dress up more.”
Senior Rengel Cajina-Cuadra adds, “Society holds standard on how we are meant to look and act as we become women. It makes us feel pressured to meet those expectations, which starts way earlier than becoming simple teenagers, and media influences how those expectations are viewed.
Separation of Childhood
For some, it is a sudden realization that you are no longer treated or viewed as a kid, but instead a woman, and may never be able to return to that childhood innocence. For others, however, it’s not a sudden thing. “I’ve been seen as a woman ever since I was little,. I was told that I had a nice body by my family and my family friends. So, I grew up with that mindset. I feel like I was always seen as a woman instead of an actual child,” stated senior Liana Bracero.
Insight/ Perspective
For some the objectifying truth behind having to be perceived as a woman in society feels unfair. As a seventeen-year-old senior L. Z. stated, “Men are the only people who are genuinely respected from the moment they are born. Women have to do so much more, and sometimes it’s things that they’re not even aware of. Like the fact that unless we’re genuinely attractive to at least a small group of men, then we won’t be respected.”
Miami High graduate Faith Garcia sees it a bit differently. “I feel like it’s a good and bad thing at the same time,” she said. “Obviously, it has its negatives. You’re expected to be this mother figure that people look up to, especially if you have younger siblings. It is hard to be a role model for them. But it can also be a positive thing because of the whole idea of girlhood and girls coming together.”
Comparison
For many women, there is a large contrast in experiences between men and women. “They don’t get cat-called, they don’t have to worry as much about standards and how they look. I mean of course they do but it’s not to an extreme. They don’t have a certain criterion,” stated senior Keila Aldana.
English teacher Ms. Suarez added, “Even the kindest, sweetest man that is understanding and would never do that kind of stuff, has never been in a woman’s shoes. Even if they wanted to understand it, they don’t get it. They don’t have that firsthand experience. So, without that firsthand experience, it’s impossible to really relate all the way. It’s not even their fault…You’ll tell them, and they’ll empathize and sympathize, but they don’t get it because they were not there.”
An anonymous eighteen-year-old V. B. adds, “I am a person who does a lot of competitions. I am also a part of a variety of clubs, and I put a lot of work and effort, but it’s not as well received, or I don’t get the credit for it compared to my male officers, just because I am a woman. I do the same amount of work as one of my officers; that’s well known. He’s this big guy at Miami High, everyone knows him, but yet I put more work than him and no one knows the efforts I make. In the outside world it’s harder for me to be in a bigger position or be a CEO, just because of the way I look, the way I act, the way I talk, and that’s because I’m a woman compared to men, who are recognized for their skill sets and how they achieve their job rather than appearances.”
Expectations
During the transition to womanhood, there are certain expectations of females. “In terms of appearance, Barbie said it really well. You have to be skinny without being too skinny, you have to be pretty without being too pretty because then that makes other girls jealous, but you can’t know you’re pretty because then that makes you conceited, but if you’re ugly, then you’re being insincere,” stated English teacher Ms. Guerra.
Senior Gizelle Gonzalez added, “There is pressure to look good, to look a certain way mainly because of social media. I saw how people reacted to certain body types, and that made me feel like I had to look that way to be beautiful. Social media affects those around you. For me it was my mother. She would tell me how I needed to watch what I ate and to lose some weight. That also made me feel as if my body wasn’t enough, like I had to change how I looked.”
Society’s dismissive behavior
Women’s individual experiences get overlooked constantly. The experiences they have lived through, and their interactions are disregarded on a daily basis. Senior Caitlyn Sandoval expresses, “After I was viewed as a woman by the age of thirteen, my experiences were overlooked such as feelings. People always said, ‘Oh you’ll get over it’ or ‘You’re just being moody’ because of that stereotype that girls are always moody when they’re on their periods, so people usually never took my mental health seriously.”
Senior Lyes Corredera adds, “Yesterday I was walking with a group of female friends and there was an old man following us for two blocks. He followed us until a teacher intervened, and when I told my dad the story, he said he was my fault for walking by myself without an adult or man.”
Jackson High School graduate Emily Aldana states, “When I was a freshman in high school, I remember I had to wear a dress, but it was a body con dress. I remember being pulled into the auditorium, into the little office in the back. I wasn’t showing anything, but it was tight to my body, and this lady grabbed me and told me that what I was wearing was inappropriate and that I looked like a prostitute. It made me feel uncomfortable. I thought it was appropriate for my age. Nothing ever happened to that lady. She was wrong, and she shouldn’t have spoken to me like that. Nothing happened to her. She didn’t receive any repercussions, no apology, nothing. It was something normal in society when it shouldn’t be.”
Sources: WomenKing.org & LinkedIn
